Love's Music
by xoVampiresxo
Summary: Bella: Rich, and naive, runs away from home to Manhattan to pursue her dreams in New York. Edward: The handsome, caring man who offers Bella a home to stay. Of course, nothing comes without a price... R&R please!
1. Leaving behind my past

**umm i hope you guys read this story and like it! i really like how the plot goes and would be great if some support were happening? :D**

"I don't want to go to Oxford!" I screamed at the top of my lungs at my parents as they sat in the oversize living room. I could hear a maid drop some expensive china, but that didn't concern me at all.

"But dear, it's for the best!" My mother pleaded, her eyes watering as she tried to reason with me. I didn't want to go Oxford though...with all those bratty spoiled rich children. Okay maybe I was rich, but never spoiled. I refused to live in a world filled with vanity and material items. I was realistic and worked for the money I spent and lived without help from others.

"Dad, I _know _youbribed the dean from Oxford so I'd get in. To be honest, I don't care! I want to go to Jullliard and you can't make me go to another university!" I was seething at the end of it, my feet stuck on the first step of the stairs as I glared at my parents. My mother was biting her lip and a sympathetic look on her face. My dad was seven shades of red and purple.

"Your future will get wrecked and who will you blame then? Some petty begger that you'll be living on the streets with? You _know _Oxford will do wonders for your future, your education and everything. Don't complain about these. I give you so much and without even saying a thanks, you say no thank you!" My father yelled back at me, his face was mad, no other words able to describe it, while my mother cried.

"I'd rather run away and get my own place to stay at than to go Oxford. You - can't - make - me." I trudged up the stairs with each word, anger flaring as I pushed aside the butler, Alan, and went straight to my room to pack. Poor Alan, he was always caring for me and I pushed him...oh well, he'll live.

My clothing were scattered everywhere, from a previous argument I had with my parents. I was however, able to pick out some pairs of jeans and shirts, nothing fancy. I was never one for those anyways. My backpack was jammed in a few minutes and the necessities I needed were secure. I had a private pair of socks, filled with the money that I had actually worked for at my father's company during one summer and it was enough to last me for awhile, until I found a job and settled in a place to live near Julliard.

Several knocks were heard on my room's locked door but I refused to answer as I finished the last of my packing and decided it to be time to leave. I flung the door open to see my mother's usually happy aqua eyes filled with tears. My heart sank as I hugged her. She wasn't the one I should be angry with, and neither was she supposed to suffer for it.

"Mom, I promise I'll look after myself. You have to promise to look after yourself too. Okay?" I cooed her like a young child, placing her in the crook of my neck and patting her shoulder. She was always the youthful, eccentric one in the odd mother-daughter relationship we had.

"Bella dear, why can't you just go to Oxford? Your father's tried very hard to give you the best in everything," she sniffed after every few words and it broke my heart to see her so sad.

"I can't, mom. I have my own dreams...my own...aspirations and what I want to use my life as. You know that. Please don't stop me." My words sounded firmer than I expected, seeing how I was about to choke on the words I spoke.

"Then promise yourself to stay out of trouble. Keep yourself happy and follow your dreams." She smiled a bit, her eyes were swollen and red as I kissed her lightly on the cheeks.

"I'm going to go now mom. Bye." She followed me down the stairs, my father was watching the flames in the fireplace burn. I didn't really want to say much and he knew it all too well. We were too alike, stubborn and unable to compromise to one anothers' demand. They were just two polar opposites.

I hugged my mother one last time and waved as I walked out the door, but not before saying a simple goodbye to the closed door. I felt hollow leaving the place I'd grown up as a child, the happy memories...everything ached.

The journey out into the city was quite pleasurable. I had a bike already parked outside of the gates of our mansion for fun, but I never expected myself to use it for traveling.

**(I don't know where Bella lives, but I thought bicycling into New York was cool)**

My thoughts were jumbled as I tried to get everything straightforward. I would first get a place to live, than a job, and finally try to get accepted into Julliard. Out of the three, the last one seemed to be the hardest. I was quick to learn, efficient and easy to work with. Jobs won't bother me. For living, I was used to anything almost, thanks to the boyish attitude I had for things, and refusing to be spoiled. I had lived in a tent, in the great outdoors, on a hiking trip with my aunt when I was around 10, and at the time, deemed a boy by the girls at my school.

Heck, if I was to be dressed like a porcelain doll and get attracted to boys because of their looks and say they have cooties all at the same time to be considered a girl, then I would never want to be.

By evening, when the sun was slowly descending into the horizon, I had already rode out into the city and preparing to seek out a place to live. New York City. The big apple.

From knowledge, I wouldn't need a place to live in after being accepted into Julliard, so it would mean a place of temporary stay and easy access to the campus was all I needed. Also, I would need to get myself a job for the tuition fee.

The only problem with things were, where do I begin? I felt incompetent in the large, crowed scene.

Apartments that were swanky and beautiful were just too out of hand and too expensive, so I'd have to resort to cheaper ones. With that in mind, I began my search through the city.

I was walking through a dark alley, someone had posted an advertisement for rent and stay and now, here I am, surrounded completely by dark except for several weak, yellow glows of lamp posts that barely illuminated the long, narrow alleyway.

A door swung open, scaring the wits out of me, and appeared four guys. They wreaked of alcohol as I walked past them, while one of them called for me.

"Hey girlie! What'cha doing?" A man with combed oily black hair smiled, his teeth a hideous colour of brown and yellow.

"Nothing." Damn my stupid knee-jerk reactions.

"Why don't you come stay with us!" Another man, with a tattoo on his neck and triceps called.

I began walking faster, away from them and more into the alleyway. I wasn't hesitant to scream but it would choke as I heard footsteps. They sounded to be about 40 feet away. Good, I should make it out of the alleyway quickly if I turned and ran from then forth...

_Shit!_

When I turned, the alleyway was just as long, but with the lessened light source, I couldn't see where the alley ended. So I took it anyways, but not before turning around to look behind me. That was strange, two of them were missing. I didn't take much notice as I scampered off towards the dark tunnel-like surrounding I was in. My eyes adjusted quickly and began taking in the details. There were back doors to pubs, restaurants, bars, but very loosely connected and looked almost run-down.

The familiar advertisement sheet caught my eye as I followed the arrow towards where it led, unable to use any logic of why I would want to live in a place like this anymore.

I began to change how I wore my backpack, placing only one strap on my shoulder while slinging it to closer to my side. Both for the convenience of running and dropping it if necessary. I doubted they were after my bag though.

The alley was quiet, completely silent except for some sounds of faraway traffic and my own heavy breathing. I could hear my own rapid heart beats as I arrived at the alley's end. What I didn't expect however, were that it was a door and besides that, a dead end. The door had several steps leading up to it. I took a quick glance behind me, hoping the men had scared me enough and left, but I was wrong. They walked towards me, two by two now. I was thinking of of what to do now.

They had completely blocked off my way out, I was left with a dead end and a door. The door seemed to be bolted shut and with my strength, wouldn't open. I was stuck, like a lab rat in a labyrinth, but without the superior knowledge of where to go.

I decided it best to just walk forward a bit, placing myself to be a confident person and not scared, but deep inside, my thoughts were in disarray and the negative side of what was going to happen was swarming. What was that move I learned in Judo before? How about Tae Kwon Do...some self-defense...I was far too worried to even remember a single thing I'd learned from the martial arts classes I took.

I walked out, a few feet from the steps and took a deep breath, holding in air to scream and preparing myself with the little available self-defense I could remember.

The men continued to advance, like dark cloaks of evil demons, readying themselves to put me through an unimaginable hell.

Being too scared, I could hear my teeth chattering against themselves and my feet losing most of its usual balance. I backed away slowly, leaning against one wall to feel for some loose brick to maybe hit them with. No luck.

As the men came closer, only a few feet away and smiling with devious grins, I looked disgust in the eyes.

"Pretty pretty girl, why did you make us do all that walking?" He smirked and leaned closer to me, grabbing my wrist. His breath smelled horrible of stale beer and cigarettes.

A piercing sound broke through the alleyway as I looked to the source. The door behind me was swung open and a man lunged himself toward the man that had grabbed hold of my wrist. The men were sent flying like pins from the force of a bowling ball as my saviour stood up, tall, dark and handsome in front of me.

**so i totally like this story and i hope you give me an honest opinion, please and thankyou's! :D**


	2. Edward, meet Bella, Bella, meet Edward

**please check out the poll I've created, about which story I should do next and well...im mindless about which one and if you like this story, vote for it! :)**

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"Uh...thanks?" I stammered, watching as the men that stalked me into the alleyway scrambled and crawled away from us. It was almost hilarious if the cold chill of breeze blew towards me and sent my teeth chattering. I watched my savior from the back, his shoulders beginning to relax and hands unclenched from its fist. He slowly turned, the full lips of his face in a frown. I examined him in the dark, his skin was alabaster pale and smooth, glowing even. His hair still shimmered with bronze and monochromatic highlights.

I saved his piercing green eyes for last. They were like embedded emeralds, placed gently against his face to complete the godlike creature. He was like the Greek gods of mythology I'd read far too much about. Straight nose, strong jawline, enticing lips, and utter perfection of his eyes. It took my breath away as I stared, transfixed by his annoyance at me. Did I do anything wrong?

"What's a girl like you doing here." It didn't even sound like a question, almost a rant.

Even if he was that perfect, my own stubbornness and hard attitude won over and the retaliating mechanism my brain seemed to have recoiled.

"What do you mean 'a girl like me'?" I asked, flabbergasted and mimicing his voice.

"I mean, a girl who should be in school or living in high society to be spoiled by their parents." He smirked at me and leaned against the wall. He looked like a model with every movement.

"That's funny, I ran away home and need a place to stay. I saw the advertisement outside and decided to enlighten this dingy place, why?" My voice was dripping with sarcasm as I stared at him. Frustrated by his face and the words that came out of it. His words were supposed to be sweet and honey-like, cooing even, but they were cold, hard and mean.

"Maybe you should just run back home then." He scolded at me, his perfectly arched eyebrows pulling together. His eyes were hard, like emeralds.

"Can't, I'm trying to get into Julliard and my parents won't let me. So, is there a place or not?" I shrugged and it seemed his face softened after my statement, smoldering eyes back. At least I seemed to have said the right thing.

"Yeah, there's a bedroom in my apartment. It's not going to be hotel quality but you can stay there. Julliard, huh?" He smiled crookedly at me, dimples showing on one side. I felt my heart speed up to match a hummingbird's and breathing subside immediately, like oxygen pushed right out of my lungs. I hadn't even noticed he'd unlocked the door and opened it until the support I had, which was the door, was removed and I'd almost fallen back.

Almost, because the man had placed his hand around my neck, breaking my fall and laughing at me.

"You should pay more attention."

"Yeah, I'll think of taking a few courses on that someday." He snickered and grabbed my hand, pulling me up. My stomach churned at his touch, warm, firm yet soft. I was on cloud nine and didn't even know I was in the living quarters of this man so quickly.

"Here's the kitchen, a bit shabby probably in comparison to your own famillie's I bet," he smirked and continued, "Of course, nothing here can be compared to that but let's continue." He led me from the kitchen and through a doorway into a little area with a television, a little couch and coffee table.

"This is the living room. There are many facilities you can use from here, from entertainment of about twenty channels, sleeping on the couch, sitting on the couch, drinking from the table, eating from the table. Shall I go on? The list is endless." He snickered at me, an amusing smile on his face as he tilted his head to the side and gesturing a hand, palm up, to the room.

"Very funny." I scowled at him and wandered off into a hallway. Two doors were across from another. I opened a door but it was quickly closed. My breath hitched as I felt his body pressed against mine, his hand on mine, trying to stop me from turning the knob.

"That room, is forbidden," he said, clearly displeased by my curiosity.

"Oh, sorry." I opened the other door.

The room was small, but cozy. There was a single mattress already set up, and a bedspread laid out. There was desk with a lamp on and leather armchair. It looked like a boarding school room.

"This is your room, if you take the offer of living here. I accommodate dinners usually, but unless I'm away, you will have to cook yourself. The fridge is partially stocked, reason being it's not very cold so perishable foods aren't preferred. So, how would you like this place Miss...?" He smiled at me, flashing his teeth.

"Just call me Bella. And yes, I would like to rent a room here. How are the prices for it?" His head slightly moved to one side, face thoughtful.

"What would you consider a reasonable price? I'm not in much dire need of money," he shrugged and looked at me questioningly.

"I don't know. Two thousand a month?" I suggested, looking at his face for any reaction to my offer.

"You're staying for that long? Auditions for Julliard and getting a room shouldn't take so long, you know," he sighed, "Nonetheless, deal."

"I'll let you unpack." I entered the room, it smelled oddly sweet, some tinges of floral scents, some sweet ones...it was abnormally nice.

"I was about to go out for dinner. Did you want to come? Or shall I get take-out?" He leaned against the doorway as I sat down on the bed, lightly bouncing on it. It was firm but soft again, just like his hands.

"Are you going to tell me your name, or not?" I asked, taking out my clothing from my backpack and piling it up together.

"Ah, right. My name's Edward Cullen." He crossed his hands over his chest and tapped his foot on the floor.

"Hungry, Edward?" I giggled at his impatient stance.

"Yes, and you're being unbearably slow. So what will it be? Take out or coming along?" I jumped off my bed and stood up, facing Edward. "I'll come along." I smiled and followed him out towards the door.

"Is your name going to be the only thing I'll get to know of you?" We were walking along the dark alleyway, but darker without the dim lighting of a sunset. I bumped into him twice, far too prone to falling and unable to see.

"First, give me your hand. Second, I don't think you need to know so much about me anyways." I reluctantly lifted my hand out in front of me, too dark to see and without a single light source, even harder to distinguish where he was except for his pale skin.

My heart went haywire as he held onto my hand, interlocked and perfect like a couple. Okay, that was a weird sensation. What was this feeling though? My breathing was shallow, unable to make it deeper. I quickly looked at our hands, and back at him, now walking side by side.

"What?" He cocked an eyebrow up just as we walked out to where the streets roared and lights blinded.

"Nothing." I whispered, looking down at my feet.

"Bella, please look up." I looked up at him, in shock and curious.

"What?" My train of thoughts derailed as I watched his mesmorizing oak-leaf green eyes watch me intently.

"I didn't want you to trip when you walked." He smiled crookedly at me and led me into a diner on the street.

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**YEAH!! WHEE! Next chapter is them doing that whole Port Angeles Italian restaurant scene, but more humanish and actually about their personalities and whatnot. Like this story? COME VOTE FOR IT IN MY POLL SO I WOULD WRITE IT! :)**


	3. They say the past sucks, I agree

**I was originally going to give this chapter more info but I thought...I needed a longer story...so I'll delay most of it hehe...**

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Edward held open the door as I entered cautiously, unused to the loud banging noises of pots and pans, the clatters of dishes and cutleries. It wasn't as dingy as I had expected it. The outside was run-down, with flashing pink neon lights for a sign, but inside, it was pretty clean.

The hostess walked up to me, but ignored me completely as she had eyes for someone else. Oh, it was Edward she had eyes on. How obvious. At that moment, I felt it would be something good to slap her...trip her on those black high heels...Hmm, the list seemed endless.

"Hey there Eddie-poo. Dinner for one again?" The hostess almost coo-ed him, seductively making circles on Edward's chest with her red painted nails. Agh, disgusting.

"No, two please, Tanya." Edward smiled and nodded towards me. I could have sworn I caught a glimpse of a scowl from Tanya, but I couldn't tell. She walked back to the podium where the menus were kept and showed us to a booth. I couldn't help feeling that same desire to slap her as she placed two hands on the table, bent down so her breasts were partially revealed and faced Edward.

"The usual please. And you, Bella?" Edward wasn't even looking at Tanya. I picked the first thing on the menu.

"Ravioli's please." Tanya grumbled something and walked off to the open kitchen where most of the loud noises were coming from.

"So, tell me about yourself." Edward grabbed a spoon and began spinning it in his hands. I was mesmerized for a few seconds until his question forced itself back into the front of my mind.

"Umm...I thought it was time for me to find out about _you._" I picked up a spoon and began spinning it too. Dammit, no luck.

A low, throaty chuckle sounded. I looked up and saw Edward smiling, his teeth flasshing.

I ticked off a mental list to consider when around Edward. Never embarrass myself. I sighed and placed the spoon back down and looked at him intently.

"So, where do you come from?" I asked, trying to decipher his voice or some way to identify his hometown.

"I moved here from Chicago." He stated blankly, spinning the metallic cutlery at an incredible rate.

"What's your age?" My brows knitted together as he answered with one word again. "Twenty."

"Hmm, same." My list of questions seemed endless but Edward seemed...annoyed.

"Here ya go." Tanya handed us both a plate, my ravioli coated with tomato sauce and melted cheese and Edward's plate. I felt almost envious as my stomach growled, feeling the unfair proportions of his steak burger.

"Did you want some?" He smirked and lifted his knife.

"Hmm, not really. But I don't get why mine's so small." I compared our platters. Yep, definitely unfair.

"I know the waitress here." He winked and gave me a crooked smile. Oh god...that smile. It was only to kill me someday. My heart fluttered.

My breath hitched for several seconds as Edward watched me.

"Aren't you hungry? I can hear your stomach grumbling from here." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Oh, right." I speared a raviolli, and melted instantly. The cheese was spewing out of the wonton skin and licked my mouth like a oozing lava. Maybe the size was bad, but the food quality was astounding. I love New York.

"So, when do you plan on auditioning for Julliard again?" He looked up after taking a bite out of the large steak burger.

I gulped down a mouthful of coke and pondered that question myself. When did I intend on applying for the post-secondary education I so wanted? How was I going to pay for the tuition with the rent so costly? Maybe I shouldn't have taken his offer for that rent price and try to get it lower...

"I have to find a job first. Tuition money, yenno?" I ate another ravioli, relishing in the taste.

"You're really living on your own, huh? Well, you know, I was kidding about the rent price. It's really only about...a tenth of what you were willing to pay." He chuckled and took another bite of his dinner.

"Oh." Well, that solved most of my problems. I saved up quite a lot of money and with the rent being so cheap, it would be easier to deal with the financial necessities.

"By the way, what do you? Dancer?" He asked, intrigued.

"Dancing...not so much. Piano and guitar though? I can manage both." He nodded his head and drank a sip of coke.

"What do you plan on becoming when you're older by following that route? You know bands that make it into mainstream are probably 1 in a thousand?" What did I want to do after I got into Julliard? What options would I have? If I didn't follow the education route my father had picked for me? Oxford seemed almost appealing now as I thought about it. How will I manage after?

"I don't know." I answered simply.

"There's a piano in the study room. You can go there to practice if necessary. As for the guitar...you'll have to pay for that yourself. Oh, and it's fifty dollars an hour for piano rentals."

My eyes widened as he said that. Cheap ass.

"I was joking." He burst into a fit laughter, a clear ring of bells in the hall of people. It was the only sound I could hear, oblivious to the rukus that was going on elsewhere.

"Sometimes you're joking and sometimes you're not. Do you know how hard it is for someone to understand what you mean completely? It's very irritating and annoying," I chided him, spearing a ravioli but hitting the plate with a _bang _noise as well.

"Well sorry, Ms. Short-temepered-can't-take-a-joke." He mused, apparently still quite laughable. Oh well, I liked the sound of his laugh and didn't mind if it meant embarrassing myself. Sigh, why did his laugh sound like that...

"Whatever. Can we go? My ears are going to be deaf if we don't." As if the God's themselves wanted to show what I meant, a waitress dropped a platter on the ground and shuffled quickly around to pick them up.

"Sure thing." He reached into his pocket and Tanya was there in a snap. Wonder how long their synch had to be built over the years? Edward reaching into his ass and Tanya walking over to him. Pfft, why am I curious about these things anyways? I pushed away the things about Edward and began contemplating other more important things.

"Oh yeah, why do you have a piano in your place anyways? Are you an aspiring musician too?" I poked him on the sides and ran off into the cold air of New York. I began shivering. Dammit, forgot my jacket.

"Here you dumb bell." He took off his jacket and placed it over my shoulder, instantly stopping the chatting sounds of my teeth. His jacket smelled good, like a lilac-honey-sun-smell...or everything good compressed into one thing. I took a few more wafts, savouring the smell and making a reminder in my head to get a mixture of smell like this in the future.

"So, are you a musician?" I persisted again. I mean, it would be pretty cool if he could give me some piano lessons - if he was good.

"I don't..._play. _The previous owner left it there," he snapped back at me, already a few feet away. I grimaced at his attitude and followed behind, my body cradling his sweater jacket like a lifeline.

We trudged for a few more minutes into the dark alleys, the all too familiar ones that, only a few hours ago, was supposedly my worst nightmare, maybe last. I shivered and brought his jacket closer to mine, almost scrunching it and inhaled deeply, calming myself like a scented candle.

"What are you _doing_?" He asked, flabbgerghasted as I looked up, shocked. We were already there and Edward's eyes were wide.

"Nothing." I managed to squeak out, throwing off the jacket and rushing into the loft. It was dark and being in such a hurry, a stupid telephone line tripped me. Oh great, stupid Edward and his telephone lines tripping me and making me fall...

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**Sigh, Bella, Bella, Bella... rofl xD Reviews please? They make me feel warm and fuzzy -heart shape- or...-happy smile- :) Haha.  
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	4. Trip to depression

**I just really love this story and I think I really wanna continue with it, the storyline and everything already planned...but I'm just too lazy to type it. LOL. Haha, I suck :(**

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"How many times a day do you expect yourself to be saved, might I ask?" Two strong white arms wrapped themselves around my waist as his velvety voice enveloped my ears like the darkness. I shut my eyes and wished I hadn't just completely embarrassed myself. Too late.

"Yeah umm, sorry." I whispered, thought of what to do, and rushed back onto course - the safety of my room.

I closed the door on my way in and sighed, releasing relief and anxiety. I slid down on the floor, leaning back on the door and thought about today. So, I run away from home, arrive at New York City, get chased by a bunch of men that probably had some plans for me that could...mean serious disaster, and then I meet some gorgeous life saver, find residence in his home, eat dinner with him, want to slap the strawberry blond waitress from the restaurant, return to my current living quarters, trip and get saved by Edward, and now sitting on the floor thinking of the day.

What a long and eventful day I had.

My consciousness told me I should shower and soon. A yawn slipped from my mouth as I grabbed my pajamas and showering necessities. The only few things I'd brought along in my bags seemed to be very pitiful, very little and not enough to sustain much longer. I groaned and thought about where to go shopping tomorrow and then work on getting into Julliard. Those, would have to be my priorities and distractions.

"Hey, are you going to shower?" A soft knock on the door and voice called.

I reached for the door and opened it to find, who else, Edward, there. What _really _shocked me was the white sleeveless shirt he was wearing. Not only were they tight and showed off his muscular body, it was slightly wet and in some areas, revealing a bit of skin. Hmm, I can definitely get used to this.

"Oh, yeah...I'll get right on it." I grabbed my showering gadgets and headed towards the bathroom.

When I was in the archway of the simple and clean bathroom, the water was already running, steaming up the mirror and room like a sauna. There were flower petals thrown into the tub with several candles lit and placed around the tub's rim.

"I thought it might be a nice welcoming gesture." Edward answered my question before it was spoken.

"Oh, thank you." I looked back and blushed. He were in such proximity, I could feel the soft breathing and captivating smell of him. The scent was more powerful, being so close and my nose perked and ready to take a big, long waft of it.

"Well, I'll let you shower. The controls are fairly easy, right is hotter, left is colder. Middle is warm. You're a smart girl, you'll know." He smiled and left, closing the door behind him. By the time I'd taken off my somewhat smelly and dirtied clothing, the faint sounds of a piano was heard...but it was too soft for me to be certain. I shrugged and got into the warm and unbearably soothing bath tub, letting the water ease the tensions in my muscles.

I'd let my mind flood with all the experiences today, generally happy with slight reminensce...

It was my first time away from home, and though I was trying to be independant, worried as heck about my parents. Problems began forming in my head, the Julliard auditions prioritized before everything else. The money as well, how was I to pay for the rent and tuition fees...being unemployed and the sock of money losing much of its contents if I didn't start earning some.

I heard it again...the same soft sounds of the piano...the flow of keys as they entered the bathroom and filling it with music. It was an unrecognized melody, beautiful and glorious all the same, yet a sense of sadness...like the bittersweet memories of a failed relationship. The arrangement wasn't one that I had heard of, completely unknown in the world of music, but equally well written to oppose those of the works of Mozart and Beethoven.

Curious, I stepped out of the tub and dried myself, hurrying to find the source. When I opened the door of the bathroom, the music had stopped abruptly, like someone had pressed paused on the stereo. But with highly trained ears, I could still identify where the piano sounds were from, in the music room.

Edward stepped out, eyes glistening and head low. His shoulders were hunched, disappointed in some way?

"What's wrong?" I asked, watching Edward as he lifted his head and smiling, but without much happiness.

"Nothing. So, I see you've got the shower to work?" he asked back, with a forced smile, it was almost heartbreaking. I couldn't truly identify why, at that moment, I wanted to make him happy, or at least save him from the sadness that seemed to be biting away the cheerier...or at least more controlled person, that I'd met earlier. They seemed two separate beings as I watched him enter his room.

I sighed, not bothering to understand the complex machinery that happened within a man's mind and decided it was best to leave it alone. The night wasn't exactly young, yet I was still unable to get some rest, though a long and eventful day. How did one get so much adrenaline into her body to not fall asleep through today, was out of my own questions.

I cudddled up into the bed, propping my pillow up and leaning on the wall with it, thinking, when a soft knock sounded.

"I hope your sleeping arrangements are accomodatable?" Edward asked, biting his lips and eyes a mesmerising sparkle of emerald green. It was breathtaking.

"You can just say good night." I smiled at his formal behaviour.

"Well, good night." He nodded and smiled as well. Again, a forced smile.

"Good night and sweet dreams." He left the room, with something just to the side of his eyes. I wasn't able to identify what'd it been, but definitely wasn't there before. It glistened too.

The night was a long, tiring one as I finally fell asleep.

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**Kay, so what have we known so far? Edward's a bit...OOOH!! :D**

**Reviews please? I have this PERFECT plot for the story and I just KNOW it's gonna be a big hit so I just kinda wanna see if you guys like it? (Cause there's no use if an author thinks its good, it's all about the readers :P)**


	5. Meeting new people

The sun's rays were bright through the lace curtains as I looked around, finding some way to block the intrusion of my peaceful rest. A gourmet smell, unlike what I was used to, was wafting into my room. I was somewhat perked to find out, yet the tiring muscles of my legs were straining to stand. Fighting back the screams they yelled out at me, I opened the door to hear the most enchanting sounds of singing. It was velvet smooth and crystal clear, piercing right through my soul. It struck my heart as being a voice like none other.

"Hello?" I called out, momentarily remembering everything that had happen since yesterday. Oh, I wasn't living in my own house anymore. I was also living with another being: Edward.

"In the kitchen." A reply answered, the singing stopped.

Edward was looming over the kitchen, his eyes soft and smile evident as I strolled over to peer at what he was cooking. It was a toast dipped with egg and being fried with butter. I'd never truly encountered such a mix of ingredients...I'd been too used to eating healthy with the maids and my family. My heart lurched into the acids of my stomach as I remembered the situation I was in. I was a runaway and should just forget about going back. I needed determination to get past this phase and follow through with my dreams.

"What is that?" I asked, taking a poke at the toast with the egg flipper when Edward turned around to pour a glass of milk.

"Drink this." He handed me the glass and flipped the toast. "It's a French toast. My mother used to make it for me, but now I just make it for myself, and now you." He leaned back on one side of the kitchen counter and smirked.

"Do you always look like you've finished wrestling a mountain lion when you wake up?"

"No!" I yelled out, placing the glass down and combing my hair down with my fingers. It _was _a haystack, but not that bad, was it?

He chuckled and ran a hand through his own messy hair. An urge to run my own fingers through his hair was strong, like a child's interest in playing with a new toy. What would it feel like, the individual strands of hair like silk, smooth and waiting for someone to touch and massage. It would feel good, I comforted with my mind, suddenly realizing how weird I was behaving. I crossed my arms and waited for Edward to stop with a stern look.

He shrugged and turned back to the toast. Gah! Stupid handsome looking jerk!

"Any plans today? Or are you going to sit around in the bedroom doing nothing?" Edward inquired, flipping the toast once more before placing it on the plate.

"Well I was thinking of either getting a job, or acquiring some application forms for Julliard. Which one should I do first?" I sat down at the high-stool beside the kitchen island and waited with a growling stomach.

"Know what your priority is? Eating. I can hear that beast of a stomach of yours from here." Edward snickered and placed the toast, with some maple syrup in front of me.

It was hot, but I ignored that as I ate. The batter was smooth, the toast was like eating a cloud. His cooking, which I was quite surprised, is amazing. I never imagined someone could make something so divine with such ...simple ingredients. Maybe having a famous French chef cooking your breakfast every morning wasn't the best, considering they used all these ridiculous names for ingredients like a truffle or herbs like fleur de sel.

"By any chance you know what's the easiest way to get to Julliard? I kind of want to get some application forms first to look through the criteria and when to audition for this year's semester." I poked another piece of toast into my mouth and waited for Edward to scrutinize the possible route in his mind.

"I guess you can take the route 21 bus just outside the alleyway and then walk for about five minutes to Julliard? It'll probably your fastest bet unless you're going to get a chauffeur or a taxi." He poured himself a glass of orange juice and sat down beside me.

"Will you be cooking dinner tonight? Or will you take me out to the diner again?" I made a sour face at that and gulped down the last of my glass of milk.

"I'm sure I can pull a dinner together tonight, unless you want to go to the diner?" I practically yelled out the answer, "No! Please no. I do _not _need to watch a woman try and seduce you with her horrible innuendo's and obvious attempts at flirting. Please."

He chuckled and picked up my empty plate and glass to wash. "She's a pretty cool person once you know her. She's a bit more...open to other people. You should see her talk to the other customers that she classifies as "Hot men". Don't want to get near that list..."

"Oh, trust me, she's way more dangerous than a hit man who intends to kill you in the slowest, most painful way." I rolled my eyes and picked up my bag and slung it over my shoulders. "I'll see you later, bye." I called, opening the door.

"Wait, you need a cell phone. Here. The first number is my cell phone, the second is home phone. Add contacts as you'd wish. Bye." He placed a small, silver rectangular device in my hand and went into his room.

The high alleyway blocked off most of the sun but from the warm atmosphere, I could tell today would be a fabulous day. The busy sounds of cars were muffled slightly from the maze of alleyways as I made my way out into the city scene. I glanced to my left and right, cautious of my surroundings and shivered from last night. I would remember to return home earlier.

I waited at the bus stop, standing behind a couple kissing quite passionately, with hair pulling and sounds. Yuck. I made a quick barf notion to the little boy behind me with an ice cream cone. He giggled and yanked his mother's arm for a napkin as his mouth dripped with melted ice cream. I laughed and smiled at the mother as she hurriedly rummaged through her large black vintage bag for napkins. I realized I had a package and gave her them, as the little boy's hands began wiping the ice cream.

"Thanks so much." She said, smiling and wiping his mouth and jaw with the tissue.

She was in her early 20's, short and extremely beautiful. Her jet black hair was tied up in a loose ponytail with stray strands framing her angelic, pixie-like face. Her eyes were a mesmerizing green, bright and shimmering in the limited rays. Even as a mother of a toddler, she dressed sophisticated and form fitting clothing with no signs of a belly or anything else that gave her the impression of ever being pregnant.

"He's always such a messy eater." The woman commented on her son, shaking her head and smoothing his curly mahogany hair back. He lifted his arm into a shaking-hand gesture and looked up at me. I shook his hand and laughed as he shook it with exaggerated swinging. His cherubic face was happy with a radiant smile.

"My name's Bella, how about yours?" I kneed down to his height and watched him think it over in his head.

"My name is Jaslisle." He wrinkled his forehead for a bit and then continued, "Nice to meet you." He beamed up at me and I felt all bubbly inside.

"That's such a wonderful name!" I said, looking up at the woman.

"My name's Alice. Named it after his father and my father." She had a sour edge to her voice but she was obviously hiding it from her son.

"Well, nice to meet you." I extended my arm and shook hers.

"So where are you two going off to?" I looked down to watch the little boy run around his mother in circles.

"I have to drop him off to preschool and then I will be off to work. How about yourself?"

The bus came at that second and we boarded it, smiling at the enthusiastic bus driver and paying our fares. It was a smooth ride, even with the notorious potholes of New York. My mood increased exponentially when I got off the bus, waving to the mother and son with Alice's phone number. She was grounded, nice, and an extremely interesting person. I could tell the both of us we're going to become good friends

I entered the grand university and followed the visible reception's desk and waited as a woman greeted.

"Hello, how may I help you?"

"I was just wondering if I could get my hands on a few application and information sheets regarding Julliard and its admission, please?"

"Of course." She handed me a booklet and began to flip through several pages, indicating what I should know, what I should remember and ecetera. I was absorbing every detail with sharp eyes as she spoke at a quick pace to cover everything. Seemed like she had to this an awful lot.

"And that would be the tuition fees for the school. Residence is provided, and partially recommended as it allows students to arrive at classes in punctual time. If there are any other information, then you may go on our website located on the bottom right-hand corner of the booklet's front page along with our phone numbers. Thank you for coming, and we will be hoping to encorporate you into our school student body soon." The woman didn't even take a breath after that. I nodded and exited, slightly shocked at how long it took for her to introduce all the information. She was definitely a talker, and utterly bored being a receptionist.

The loud noises of New York was deafening as I walked onto the street. I was far too used to the quietness of the university front desk and the woman's voice and it took me almost by surprise. It was always quiet at home unless the occasional piano playing my mother did, or the classical music that was played in and around the house. It seemed like the world stopped, paused even, whenever I was with my parents...everything they did revolved around me, whether it be my father working and traveling to everywhere for his internet website empire, or my mother's constant suggestions of prestigous gatherings like the Sorority girls and such.

My heart ached to return home, and yet if I did, all those motivations I had for a life where it wouldn't be directed by my parents, or have interferances and priorities and...all the "easy way" to things wasn't what I wanted. I held onto the booklet in my hand tighter and walked to the bus station to return home. At least, for now, it's my home.


	6. Rosalie's bar

When I returned, Edward was busily mopping the floor. It smelled of fresh lemons and orchards in the open kitchen area when I entered. Classical music was being played as he swerved everywhere, quickly cleaning everything in a matter of minutes. He looked up and smile, turned down the music and stationed the mop with his hands. His outfit - a white apron and t-shirt with sweatpants was almost comedic. I never imagined such a statuesque man to wearing such plain outfits, but like all good models, it was unbelievably handsome on him. His hair was pulled back, away from his face and in a disarray.

"So, how was the receptionist at Julliard? Heard she's quite the talkative one." He offered a seat for me as I took off my shoes. I sighed with the comfort of my feet getting its rest.

"That's an understatement. I swear that woman produces a gallon of saliva every minute. She drones on forever and doesn't seem to get tired!" Groaning, I placed my Converses' to the side and looked around for a pair of slippers, not wanting to get my feet wet.

"What are you looking for?" Edward asked, peering over my shoulder to where I crouched. The smell that radiated off him was incredible. More potent than ever before, it was freshening, masculine and yet held onto the essences of a flower...lilac, some traces of honey and the sun, and other aromas that smelled heavenly.

"Well I was hoping to find a pair of slippers. The floors are wet after all." I said, looking up at his smirk and continued to search through his shoe cupboards. It was rather empty except for two pairs of sneakers, a pair of leather shoes, some runners and sandals. Nothing I could find to wear though.

"They are? I think your eyes need to be checked..." Edward said teasingly.

"Oh... hey! Well, they were wet before, so shush." I placed a hand to my lips and scowled at him, then walked towards the kitchen for a glass of water. My throat was dry from all the hustling and bustling.

"What do you do here all day anyways?" The water from the glass jug was cool and refreshing as I drank it quickly.

"I work to please your requirements, madam. The house is clean and everything you may need is prepared." He spoke with a British accent in a serious tone, though I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Ha-ha. So are you going to tell me how you sustain yourself in this overpopulated city or what? I was too preoccupied with Julliard to remember getting a job. Any recommendations?"

He hummed a tune for awhile, expression thoughtful.

"I take up work at night. Would you like to come along? It might be of interest to you..." He spoke in a faraway look, pursing his lips for a second and then smiling at me. He put away the janitoral cleaning equipments and returned with a guitar. The d-string was hanging limp and curled, probably used too forcefully or just from too many years.

"I have a guitar, and yes, it's something you'll need when we go out tonight. Try to wear a few layers, tonight's getting unseasonably cold for spring. I'm going to take a nap for a bit, but have fun practicing." He turned around and paused for a bit, "Oh, and the string...I don't think you'll be playing a tune with that string, will you? If so, I have a spare I bought, never got the time to change it. Do you want to?"

"That would be great actually. Do you want me to get it? Where is it?" I stood up but Edward was already walking down the hall, "I'll get it, sit down," he commanded. I shuddered at the sudden cold tone of his voice but thought otherwise of it, maybe he was just grumpy from being tired.

"Here's the package. If you need tools, it's included as well...try not to kill that guitar. You did take some lessons on repairing guitars, right?" He raised an eyebrow at my intent gaze on the guitar and the package he'd handed me.

"I know how to fix and tune guitars, thank you very much. Now go nap." I was opening the package and started to loosen the knob of the broken string, when the poundings of piano keys echoed from the end room of the hallway. It sounded with the deep tones of reminiscence, lingering with despair and sadness. It rang out from the heart, causing goosebumps throughout my body as I continued to listen. Every pitch, every stroke of note was perfectly executed, beautiful in its own individuality, yet astounding as a whole. I hadn't even noticed myself mumbling lyrics to the piece, until the playing had stopped abruptly.

I resumed my work, thinking over the melody and how the words I'd sung along to would fit. I was intrigued to get my hands on a music sheet or some sort that he was playing from, especially how wondrous it sounded.

When the living room was illuminated with bright orange and yellow from the sunset, Edward came out, dressed in blue jeans and a black t-shirt, smiling. His eyes were unusually red as he analyzed my handy work with the guitar.

"I'm surprised, I'd imagined the guitar to become mangled and utterly destroyed...those slim hands of yours aren't just for looks." He said with a mocking tone. I rolled my eyes at him and stood up.

"So, do we head out now?" I asked, grabbing the guitar from him and putting it away in the case he'd just brought out.

"Yes, get dressed to impress and we can head out." He ushered me out the door after I put on my shoes and we walked side-by-side, through the winding labyrinth of brick walls to the main street and waited for a bus. I tried reading where the bus was headed, but Edward was trying to keep it a secret and blindfolded my eyes whenever I could have had an opportunity to find out.

When the bus stopped and Edward said it was our stop, he held onto my hand and kept another over my eyes. His strong, firm hand sent shockwaves throughout my body, jolting my nerves awake. It was masculine and smooth, warm and inviting. I couldn't quite grasp just how excellent it felt. He let go for some second, opening a door and pulling me. The inviting smells of coffee and cocktails bombarded me as the place's heat warmed me up fully.

"Ta-da!" He whispered into my ears, holding my shoulders and waiting for my reaction.

The club-like place was packed with all kinds of people, mostly musicians and the audience that came for local concerts. There were comfortable looking sofas spread out everywhere, all looking towards a small center stage with lights and a wide range of musical instruments arranged. It looked cozy and friendly, everyone watching intently at the man performing on the stage now. He was playing the guitar in such a way that I could never have imagined possible. It sounded great.

"Edward!" A melodic female's voice broke the silence as she walked over to us. She was tall, statuesque and beautiful. Beautiful seemed to lack substance as I watched her luscious golden hair float around her gorgeous face. She was...well, my confidence level drops to a new time low when I saw her. Her voluptuous, goddess-like figure was covered in a t-shirt and jeans, casual yet sexy. It pained for me to watch her, glorious and immorally perfect, as she greeted us.

"Rosalie! How are you?" Edward greeted, smiling and doing a quick hug with the woman. I felt...odd as she hugged him.

"I've been better. Everyone's rather rowdy, hoping to hear you play the piano." She smiled and looked towards me. "What a pleasure to meet Edward's...girlfriend, I presume?"

"Oh, no no no! Ha ha...I'm just a ..friend. My name's Bella." I said, stammering a little. I didn't know if Edward considered me a friend yet...or were we just ...landlord and attendee? I didn't want to make anything up that wasn't true.

"Well, I hope we can hear you show off some musical talent then! Edward's piano playing gets a bit boring after awhile!" Rosalie's arm gestured to the stage as I gulped.

"I don't think I can do anything worth people watching..." I was extremely nervous to be performing in front of so many people, but more intimidated to be in front of Edward...he just seemed so good on what he did, it easily overshadowed what I did.

"Nonsense! I believe you can and you will get that chance. But now, let's let Edward get ready for his performance, shall we?" Edward smirked then left and walk over to the edge of the stage just as the man who'd been playing guitar bowed and thanked the audience.

"Would you like to join me at the bar, Bella? I can make you a mean cocktail." She dragged me through the maze of sofas and sat me down at one of the stools in front of the bar. All the design at this place was simple, yet elegant. From the red velvet sofas to the black coffee tables, to the little candles on each table...everything fit so beautifully with one another. The bar was mainly black and white with monochromatic colours of reds adorning as accessories to the design.

"So what would you like? A Lusty Slushy, a Bikini waxer, or a Mud wasabi...anything sound appealing?" Rosalie chuckled, "Don't worry, I was joking. How would you just like a Shirley Temple?"

"Definitely, I lost track of the other drinks after Lusty." As Rosalie handed me a drink, the first key of a piano was struck. I recognized the notes immediately, being one of Debussy's pieces. Yet, I couldn't remember the name...it was like knowing the word to a crossword puzzle, but forgetting it just as it was about to be written down. I closed my eyes and listened to Edward's playing, surprised at how precise his fingers executed them, the soulful calling of the instrument.

"You really like his playing, don't you?" Rosalie asked, sitting next to me on one of the stools. "Not just his looks."

"Why do you say that? I thought everyone here appreciates the music." I said, eyebrows knitting together to understand what she meant. Everyone was still keeping their gaze on Edward, mesmerized.

"You'll be surprised at how many of these people, girls and guys, are here only because of Edward, not his playing. You're probably the first." Rosalie smirked and leaned back onto the counter. "Do you see that faraway look in his eyes when he's playing? He's mourning right now."

"Why?" I asked, waiting for an answer. Edward played the last note, stood up, bowed and descended down the stairs, making his was back to us. I understood what Rosalie meant as a few of the girls were moving their necks in the direction of Edward, their eyes on him. Curiosity itched every inch of my body as I wanted desperately to know why Edward would be mourning.

"Tell you later." She mouthed, walking back behind the counter and making a concoction.

"Thanks for settling that crowd, now do you think it's too much to sell some drinks to them too?" Rosalie joked around and placed a fruity cocktail for Edward.

"Did you like it? I saw one of your CD's lying around in your room and it was Debussy's so..." He took a sip and waited.

"Want a compliment or technical adjustments to your playing? I can do both. No, I'm joking, it was great. I'm surprised you came searching my room...that's a federal offense yenno!"

"Okay, next topic. So, did you wanted a job? This is a great place to build up a fanbase _and_, drumroll please," Edward looked at Rosalie as they both tapped the counter, "You get paid!"

"Hmm, appealing...very. Just one problem."

"What? Not big enough of a stage for you? Not good enough of a place?" Rosalie asked, scornful almost.

I laughed at that idea...I would probably faint at the idea of even performing in front of my own mirror image. Not the most confident girl around.

"Let's just say I'm shy..."

"And you think performing in front of the Julliard entrance audition professors is going to be easy? Think about it: this can help you build that confidence you need when you're auditioning." Edward reached for my hand, and with only a second's contact, the electric jolt I felt whenever we made contact, was exhilarating.

"Please?" I blanked out completely as his smoldering green eyes stared depthlessly into my soul. Piercing through every facade I'd placed to keep myself from the outside world. Was I more reserved than I gave myself credit for?

"Just give her some time, Edward. I think Bella needs some sleep, so go on and escort her home. Bye you two, see ya soon." Rosalie smiled and ushered us to leave, giving Edward eye signals the whole way. Huh? Was I missing something?

"Bye bye Rosalie, and thanks so much for letting me stay here." I smiled and waved as she nodded.

The warm atmosphere I'd been in didn't prepare me for the cold winds and drafty temperature when we stepped out. I hunched my body, trying to keep myself warm as we walked.

Edward sighed and took off his leather jacket, putting it on me, shaking his head the whole time.

"Are you insane?! It's cold! Take it back!" I tried taking it off and giving his jacket back, but he placed his arm on my shoulder. "Take it, you're a lot colder than I am." If I wasn't feeling so guilty, his arm on my shoulders would have caused quite the circumstances for myself to blush.

"Fine," I grunted. He gave me a heart-frenzy causing smile and led the way.

"Don't say I told you so." I snapped, my teeth chattered against each other as I relaxed into the warmth of his jacket.

It smelled divine, sharp and masculine, every bit wonderful like him. It was warm too, that was a bonus. He was only wearing a t-shirt but didn't seem to mind, or so I thought. His pace quickened as we approached the bus stop.

"You shouldn't offer your jacket when it's freezing cold." It was my time to shake my head as I began to take it off, reluctantly.

"I've got a better idea, hold on." He stood in front of me, crouched down for a second and lifted me up. I shrieked at the sudden jerking movements as his hand grabbed hold of my thighs and I was ravaging to keep hold of myself.

"Don't scare me like that!" I yelled, smacking him playfully on the shoulders.

He laughed at my clumsiness and began walking. I slipped my arm out of the jacket sleeves so it would cover both of us, since his jacket was just so much bigger than what I could wear alone. I wrapped it around both of us as he carried me to the bus stop.

If it weren't so unbearably cold, I would have truthfully loved the experience. My cold body clinging to his warm, well-built body was...well, I really couldn't describe it. What I did know though, was that it felt good. Real good.

I leaned my head onto his shoulder, a little bit tired. My head felt heavy and the proximity between our bodies was intoxicating for me. I wanted to be closer to him.

"Thank you." He whispered, coming to a halt in front of the bus stop.


	7. His dark past

**OKAY, I am BACK. I KNOW. I AM BACK. Wait, -cues music-**

**Gossip boy back to let you into the scandalous life of the rich and famouss....or just Edward and Bella. Hahaha..**

**Okay I am like, completely HAPPY to begin typing my A/N's again because some people actually LIKE to read it and it puts a smile on their faces. so (by the way, if u ever smile too much and turn into the whole Joker thing, i'm gonna become a dentist, hopefully, and i might be able to help) how is everyone doing? PLEASE REVIEW. i know, it's like, not even demanding, so like, GO AND DO IT DAMMIT.**

* * *

_I watched in terror at the shrouding darkness swallowing me whole. I couldn't understand what it meant, or how it related with my life, but I could feel it overtake me. It felt horrible...my body didn't move as much as I screamed for it to do something, anything but lie there, stuck in the same, vulnerable position. My mouth was hoarse and dry, impossible to call for help. I watched as my life flash before me, my childhood, my parents, my home, even...Edward. Everything was slowly fading away from my vision. It felt horrible, the lump in my throat swelled, suffocating me as I hoped for death...anything but this. _

_"Bella!" A voice called, the angelic sounds of...  
_

"Bella!" That same enchanting voice broke through the darkness, like a beam of light through my nightmares.

"Oh." I exclaimed. Beads of sweat rolled down my forehead as I felt my sweaty body and wet t-shirt cling to my skin.

"Edward!" I wrapped my arms around him, sobbing as I inhaled his sweet scent. It calmed me down a lot faster than anything else. I sough comfort, and in him, I found the sense of security I needed.

He was taken by surprise from my embrace, but he slowly cooed me with soft murmurs, stroking my hair and back, steadying my pounding heartbeat.

I wiped my tears and looked up at his face, "I'm sorry. I was just..."

"It's okay, come here." He pulled me into a tender caress and continued to speak soothingly. "You were screaming so I thought you were being strangled by someone. But it was just a nightmare, thank God."

"I really don't know what happened...and, I'm very sorry for waking you up..." I looked at the bedside alarm clock and it read 8:00 a.m. It was a very late night we had yesterday, and the guilt was overshadowing the horrible nightmare. It felt great and all to have him here, but ...it was an awful thing for someone to come comfort me! If I ever had nightmares, as I sometimes did, my mother would come into my bedroom, make a hot chocolate with vanilla ice cream and sit down with me in my bed as we both drank the liquid.

"It's fine. Can you wait here for awhile? I'll be right back. You won't even know I'm gone." He got out of bed and smiled. I nodded and watched him go, feeling lonely. I never got over a lot of things from my childhood. Sure, I was bold enough to run away from home, and be independent, but was I really ready to fully "grow up"?

"Here's something I thought you might like." Edward's voice broke my reverie and as I glanced up at the mug, I was shocked.

"Is that...hot chocolate with ice cream?" I asked, completely taken by surprise.

He looked at me, half confused and half bewildered. "You knew?"

"Yeah well, it's a comfort beverage my mother always makes for me..." I chuckled and took my mug as he sat down beside me.

"Do you want to talk about it? I don't mean to pry..." I took a sip. It tasted exactly the same as my mother's. The chocolate was flavourful, aromatic and strong, with just the right balance of ice cream that had already begun to melt. It tasted excellent. It was then that I ached to see my mother, and realized just how much I missed home. Was I being irrational to run away? Too bad, the decisions made and if I went back now, it would just prove how immature and unready I was to my father.

"Just missed my parents, I guess." I propped a pillow on the wall and leaned against it. He sat beside and watched my face intently.

"Missing your parents doesn't involve screaming. Please tell me. It's getting me anxious and I don't even know where to start when I'm trying to comfort you!" He groaned like a big child. I saw in his eyes that he was sincere, that he did want to help me. What wrong was there in telling him how seemingly unprepared I was to live on my own...

"I feel...small, incompetant and well, just really unable to live on my own. I miss my parents, but all the aspirations I have just...I don't know. I want to give up. It's so hard for me to live on my own when I miss them so dearly, and yet this big looming fate of what I want and need is so different. The polar opposites of each other is making my head...big!" I groaned out loud, venting my frustrations in a very un-ladylike manner. Did it matter? I didn't have a good impression on Edward anyways.

"Do you want to hear my story? Of how I came..." He gestured around the room I was in, but I knew he meant a bigger picture, "Here?"

"If it involves the recipe of the hot cocoa, yes." Grinning and nodding, he moved to a more comfortable position, placing his mug down on the bedside table.

"This isn't a happy story. Our family is torn in so many ways, that it doesn't seem possible to repair it at all.

My father, the center of our family, and my mother had three children. Me, Emmett, and Alice. Emmett was the typical overprotective but soft and sensitive brother. A teddy bear, you can say. Alice is the eccentric, happy sister. We were a grateful family, all of us content with what we had. As my father's career as a doctor overtook most of his time, his workaholic schedule made us all disappointed in him. I could still remember the arguments my mother had with him, trying to reason out plans for our family's leisure time. He had none for us.

It wasn't that our own behaviour had faltered, nor was it the lack of care we were receiving, because my mother did. Normally, we would be perfect angels raised with manner and grace, but as we began to distant ourselves from the family, everyone had their own goals, whether it be good or bad. Emmett started going to bars, drowning his sorrows in alcohol. That was where he met Rosalie. She helped him get off liquor, and since then, they've been together and inseparable."

I was curious at this point, "Wait, was that bartender woman...her?"

Edward nodded, smiling. "Yes, she owns that bar. Emmett is now an entrepreneur and began starting some businesses around Manhattan, one of them is that bar."

"So you actually go to your brother's girlfriend's bar to sing...and get paid for it? That's so odd..."

"Actually, it's my brother's fiancee. They're getting married next month." He sighed and sipped his mug. "Anymore questions or can I continue?"

"Oh, yes please. So what happened to Alice?" My own cup was nearing the bottom as I moved the cup in odd positions, trying to make sure the liquid was mixing with the ice cream and cocoa.

"Well, she fell in love also. Ran away from home, leaving nothing but a note with an apology, saying she had to follow her own dreams and love. No one's heard from Alice...she requested for us to not look for her, and we gave her that much."

"What happened to your parents then?" Was it bad to sound excited to want to learn more about Edward's dark pass? The 'mourning' business Rosalie told me about was itching to find its answer. Was this linked to it?

"As you can imagine, both of my siblings have left the family, wanting their own lives. My father had a few plans, wanting to find another half for me, trying to keep me from straying to find my own dreams. He looked among the rich and powerful men who had daughters, and found one girl. Her name was Elizabeth.

I still remember the time when we first met, her golden hair held up in a messy bun and stray locks everywhere. Her fair skin almost shimmered in the sun when we went to a family picnic my mother had arranged. I truthfully didn't know who she was at first, nor knew that she was who my father wanted to marry into our family. Weeks passed, we did many things lovers did; piano playing in evenings, reading books on the lawn during the Sunday afternoon, but at the time, I never felt 'that way' towards Elizabeth. It was like treating her as if she was my sister."

Pausing and choking a little before he continued, he looked at the bracelet around his arm, moving it this way and that.

"One day, Elizabeth dragged me to the park where we had first met. The day was unseasonably cold and rain had begun to fall, skies gray and gloom. She led me under an oak tree and with a strong, loud voice, she yelled out 'I love you Edward Cullen!' She then reached forward, pulling herself up towards me and tried to kiss me. I wasn't thinking straight at that moment, but I took hold of her shoulders, stopping her, and watched her struggle with tears. Her face was wet, though it was unable to tell whether they were tears or the rain. I thought it was tears."

Edward stopped, taking a deep breath and a tear welled on the edge of his eyes. I didn't know how to comfort him, yet part of me wanted to do something...anything. I felt helpless, watching him fight to hold himself. My arm automatically held onto his, firmly grasping it. I didn't know if soothing him and stroking his hand would help, but I had to try everything.

"You don't have to tell me anymore if you don't want to." I said, caressing his cheek with my other hand, brushing away a fallen tear.

He took a few more ragged breaths and continued. "I confronted her, asking her what she was trying to do. She didn't answer, but instead, ran off. I followed, scared she might get sick from the rain. No use, she ran into the street and a car was passing, it skidded in the rain and..."

His body shook with crying, cursing himself for his stupidity. His clenched fist was turning white, paler than his already fair skin. I tried to unclench it, hoping the nails hadn't broken into the skin membrane yet.

"I - could have - stopped her..." he said through hitched breathing. I could see how hard he was trying to compose himself, to hide behind a mask.

"Let it out, you'll feel better." His arms embraced me, taking me by utter surprise as he cried. If the despair and guilt wasn't killing Edward inside, I would have rejoiced at our proximity. There were fresh tears when he stopped, truly having let everything out.

"I'm sorry. I was holding that in for too long, I guess. I couldn't even go to her funeral. I was scared I would breakdown there...and here I am!" Edward did a few more controlled breathing before turning towards me, looking at my wet t-shirt.

"I'm also sorry for that." He pointed towards my soaked shirt, which was so unfortunately, white, and revealed the outline of my bra.

"It's fine..." I stammered, getting up and finding a sweater to put on.

"That outburst, I thought it wouldn't be as dramatic, but I guess it just combusted. You don't think I'm a drama queen, do you?" He chuckled, a little.

"No, I think it's rather cute even." I walked up to him and whispered, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." Tapping his nose and slipping into a sweater, it felt light again. The atmosphere didn't have the hanging veil of shadows that it once had. Edward it seemed, was genuinely smiling, the smoldering twinkle in his eye returned.

"Thank you. For everything." He said, getting up and taking both our empty mugs of hot chocolate residue.

"Remember, if you ever need someone: I'm here." I laughed and hoped that he would trust me enough, to tell me what he was going through.

"Hey, you too." He closed the door softly on his way out, humming a more lighthearted tune.

* * *

**so how'd you guys like that? im starting to get good at building emotions up from reading so much books in my spare time, lol. i was reading romeo and juliet recently(i memorized the balcony scene in act 2 scene 2? I think... the one with "he jests at scars..." one), and then im off to read..vampire academy. it's a SUPERB series by richelle mead so check it out!**

**so like recently i was really busy playing soldier front and all so i didn't type much, haha. OH. AND I LOVED my springbreak cause i got to sit at home, in front of my computer and i think my butt started growing moss and other fungus..ew, lol. or maybe it's cause i didnt shower much (i showered like, once every 2 days? hahaha...)**

**so okay, well gossip boy has to go off and like, do his thing, whatever it might be. **

**xoxo, gossip boy**

**P.S. REVIEW**


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